First lesson ever preview

So my first step into the world of teaching is not complete. Did I step well? Did I slip? Did I step in some poop? I think the easy answer is, yes.

I haven't had a chance to listen to myself yet, but I wanted to get a few thoughts down about how I feel before I review my lesson and inevitably beat myself up. In a good way.

I really appreciated all the people who stopped to give me a word on encouragement. Whenever I feel like I didn't do great and people tell me I did, I always have slight doubt of their truthfulness. I know that's wrong and I'm working on it. I do think they are genuine in their comments and meant what they said though. I'm sure it wasn't terrible, but I think I'm really focused on improvement and because of that I am only seeing the areas of growth. I guess I should stop and recognize the task I have completed and praise God for getting me through. Hold on. I'll be right back.......ok back. It essentially needs to come back to God. I can work to improve my teaching skills on my own and they may improve, but I need to humble myself and remember I am doing God's will by teaching about ... well for now, God's will.

I've been reading Proverbs and there were a couple verses that stuck out to me pertaining to wisdom/teaching and felt related to today.

Proverbs 9:10

"The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom,
and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.

Proverbs 15:31-33

³¹ He who listens to a life-giving rebuke

will be at home among the wise.

³² He who ignores discipline despises himself,
but whoever heeds correction gains understanding.

³³ The fear of the LORD teaches a man wisdom,
and humility comes before honor,

I found it interesting that both talked about fear of the Lord is the gateway to wisdom. I also appreciated hearing about humility coming before honor. I think that fits in well with my last post about how in the past I wanted to put honor before humility. It's a reminder that I'm not done being humbled now that I'm teaching. If anything I need to humble myself more.

Normally rebuke and discipline don't inspire great thoughts in many people's minds, but these verses bring me some relief because they're reminders that I won't get better until I am humbled. I know that I need to be taught how to be better and much of that will probably come from someone other than me. I have to "heed correction" so that I can "gain understanding" and improve. I mean I don't love failure and criticism is always hard to hear, but they are so necessary for progress. It's like that old adage: you can't teach a lesson without breaking some eggs...or is it you can't make an omelet without writing a lesson plan? Either way, I've got a long way to go.

Let the task of listening to myself and beating myself up begin. I'll report back after I've listened and reflected.